


Michael Chareth

by Cress221



Category: Arrested Development
Genre: Alternate Universe, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-28
Updated: 2020-04-28
Packaged: 2021-03-01 18:14:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,462
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23891422
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cress221/pseuds/Cress221
Summary: And now for something completely different... What if Michael was not born a Bluth? Instead he was part of a normal middle class family, and he wanted to become a maritime lawyer. Then he met a part-time magician that was all magic.
Relationships: George Oscar "Gob" Bluth/Michael Bluth
Kudos: 16





	1. A New Secretary

**Author's Note:**

> In the Bluth family, there were only three kids: Gob, Lindsay and Buster. There were no Boyfights, but there was still a secret adoption, traumatic lessons, Motherboy dances, and Milford Academy. In the absence of a favorite son, George focused all his love on Lindsay, but she rebelled from him at the new-age feel-goodery and kept getting pregnant in high school. George and Lucille still hated Gob, and somebody else like cousin Larry worked the banana stand as a kid. Lindsay dropped out of college, married Tobias and moved to Boston. She still took the Bluth Company paychecks while refusing to move home and work at the company. With Buster being a perpetual student, George didn't have any family members as employees except Gob, and that was only on paper so Gob could play in the annual softball games.
> 
> While doing magic, Gob still becomes Nellie's pimp, but he cries instead about his parents both hating him even more than they hated sissy cousin Larry who worked at the banana stand. Other relatives were kicked "out of the family" and he's afraid he'll be kicked out too.
> 
> In 1989, Gob doesn't have a Segway yet, only a Camaro. Michael has a modestly priced used car, instead of a bicycle.

Michael Chareth wanted to be a lawyer, but his family didn't have the money to send him to an ivy league school. So Michael was doing pre-law at UC Irvine for now and he was going to take a summer job working as a temp secretary at a place called the Bluth Company. That way he could earn some money and maybe go to Stanford law school after he graduated.

George Bluth hated having to hire a male secretary, but his wife Lucille insisted, since she caught him sleeping with his female secretaries too many times. So Michael settled in at the desk and tried to follow the orders of the crazy boss, but all the other employees warned him not to get comfortable. They told him about Black Friday mass firings and possible embezzlement. Michael wondered if he should have got a job at Sitwell Housing instead.

But one day, Gob comes into work, to check out the new secretary. The guy's got a geeky haircut, but he's still very hot. Looks a little bit like Nellie too. Maybe they're related? "Hey. What's your name?" Gob sat on the desk and tried flirting with him.

"I'm Michael. Are you here to see Mr. Bluth?"

Gob scoffed. "I know he's not here. Probably sneaking off to cheat on Mom some more."

Michael did know about George Sr.'s affairs already. He was told to make excuses and forward phone calls if Lucille called to check up on him. "You're his son...?" He wasn't sure if this was Buster or Gob.

"Gob Bluth," he said and tried to do a magic trick, but he sprayed lighter fluid on Michael instead.

"Hey!" Michael grabbed a tissue to clean up.

Gob apologized, but added, "Still, where'd the lighter fluid come from?"

Michael sighed. He had already been warned about Gob. George Bluth had told him that his "idiot son" did magic, and often tried to sneak into the office to cause trouble. George Sr. told Michael to keep him out.

So Michael tries to do that, but Gob insists that he works here. That he should have an office and secretary and everything, but Dad only gives him company cars. (And it's only to appease Gob during the softball games against Sitwell.)

Michael is surprised to learn about that.

Gob slips past him into his dad's office to get on the computer. He writes the penus program while Michael tries to stop him. "And you misspelled penis."

"I know that," Gob said. "It's funnier that way. Look at him all smug with that frozen banana." He gestures to the framed picture on the wall, then runs the program.

"Mr. Bluth--"

"That's my dad. Call me Gob."

Michael tries to get Gob to leave, but Gob wants to hang out, and shuts the door to the office, trying to flirt with Michael.

Michael says he's straight and has a girlfriend.

Gob says, "Then why aren't you fucking her instead of working at this crummy job?"

"Some of us have to work to earn our living." Resentful of Gob's wealthy family.

"I work," Gob says, explaining about the dirty side jobs he always has to do. He keeps trying to win his family's approval, but never gets it. Dad hates him, and Mom hates him too.

Michael grudgingly feels sympathy and begins to think that Gob's not such an idiot after all. That he came here to pull these pranks not out of childishness but because he had no other way to relate to his awful family.

"You want to see my company car?" Gob asks him. "We can go out to lunch. I'll take you to the country club." He had a company credit card and wanted to spend it.

Michael declines again, and opens the door to leave. The phone rings on his desk and he has to get back to work.

Gob leaves for now, but spanks him on his way out. He's not giving up yet, just going to tell Franklin about the hot new secretary.

For days, he keeps coming back to charm Michael and impress him, even bringing Franklin.

Michael doesn't think the puppet is funny, and tries to hush Gob so that the employees won't hear the racist jokes.

Sitting on the desk, Gob tells him about the time he got beat up outside a club in Torrance. He likes talking to Michael. He's a good listener like Nellie. Gob would be glad even if the only thing he did was cry with Michael.

Michael feels sorry for Gob and tries to humor him about Franklin.

Gob asks about Michael's girlfriend Tracey. Does she like magic? Maybe they could come to one of Gob's magic shows.

Michael says that Tracey's going to school out of state and can't come, but he accepts the invitation finally.

That night, he goes to the Gothic Castle and sees how bad Gob's magic show is, but now he's worried because he realizes that Gob thinks Franklin is alive. It's not just an act, or an attempt to be funny. It's sincere. He feels so worried about Gob.

Gob wants to think of this as a date, and after the show, Michael meets him in the dressing room to talk. Gob tries to kiss him, to say that his girlfriend won't find out that he cheated.

Michael stops him and shakes his head. "Not gay, remember." Then he drives Gob home, because he's so drunk. He learns that Gob lives on a yacht. He's got a fancy car and a yacht, but he doesn't have a real home. He doesn't have what he needs, a family that loves him. Michael hugs him and tries to comfort him. Glad that he wasn't born into this awful family.

Gob clings to him and weepily asks, "You kinda like me, huh?"

Michael nods, but won't let Gob kiss him. Says he wants to be just friends. Gob pouts in disappointment. Michael squeezes his hand and hugs him. Says he never had a brother. Maybe Gob could be the brother he never had. They could be like family.

"Okay." Gob finally gives up, just glad to have somebody like Nellie who could keep away the darkness inside him.


	2. Falling in Love

At some point, George Sr. catches Gob in the office with Michael and tries to lecture Michael about keeping Gob out. Michael defends Gob, and Gob feels happy.

George realizes that his son is attached and clingy. Decides to pay Michael to be Gob's friend and keep him out of the office. George could also secretly hire a female secretary and just have Michael pretend to Lucille that nothing changed at the office.

Michael tries to argue, but Gob wants Michael to agree, to come have fun with him on the beach. Michael feels sad that Gob would even take paid companionship, and he does still need money for law school, so he gives in.

"Good," George Sr. says. "Now get out of here." (So now he hires Kitty.)

Gob excitedly pulls Michael along, and they leave the office together. Michael assures him that he'd be his friend even without money. Gob hugs him and shrugs it off. Tells him he's used to people being his friend for money. That's how it was in high school when he was popular and won a class election against some nobody geek. Everybody wanted him to buy them stuff. Gob also slept with many girls, even though they didn't really like his magic.

Michael feels sad, and realizes that Gob doesn't have anybody to be his true friend. He feels tender and protective.

Gob takes him for another ride in his Camaro, stopping at the banana stand to buy a Gob, which he shares with Michael until it melts all over their hands. They laugh and clean up, then he takes him to the Balboa country club to hang out by the pool and have lunch. Michael sees more of the fucked up world he lives in, and is amazed that Gob didn't turn out worse. No wonder he used Franklin for a friend, because he couldn't trust anyone else to actually want him for himself instead of the Bluth name and money.

Michael confides in Gob and talks about wanting to become a maritime lawyer. Gob invites him to the yacht again, and is charming. Tries to take him fishing on the ocean, but Michael gets queasy. So they return to the dock to talk. Michael worries that his seasickness means he won't be able to be a maritime lawyer. Gob suggests he just get pills for that.

As they bond, he offers Michael advice on having sex with Tracey when she comes to visit.

"I thought you were gay?" Michael asks.

"I'm bi," Gob says, rolling his eyes. "Haven't you noticed all the magic groupies I get?" Plus his many sexual harassment lawsuits at the Bluth Company.

Michael says, "Oh. Well, I thought you were putting on an act so your homophobic parents wouldn't find out you're gay."

"No I've fucked tons of girls too. I haven't told my parents I'm bi, though. They always used to tease my sissy cousin Larry, and they hate Lindsay's gay husband. Dad once tried to shove Tobias out of a moving car."

"Oh." What a screwed-up family.

Gob just returns to giving sexually explicit advice, hoping to make Michael hot.

Michael's too embarrassed, though, and excuses himself to go home.

Little by little, they grow closer, and Michael is falling for him without realizing it. On the phone, Michael tells Tracey about Gob a lot. Saying he is trying to show Gob how to have a normal friend, and not need Franklin. Wants to teach him about the wider world outside his bubble in Orange County.

Maybe he could convince Gob to go to college, and Michael could help him study for a fulfilling career. "What if you went to school to learn how to make real computer programs?" But Gob still likes magic and doesn't see the point of college. Lindsay dropped out, and Buster was still going to college, learning useless stuff. So Michael gives up on that project, and tries to help him improve his magic instead. He agrees to be Gob's magic assistant so that he at least feels that he's earning the Bluth Company paycheck. They rehearse together often.

People around Orange County joke about them dating, always being together. (Maybe Lucille thus finds out about George secretly hiring Kitty to be his secretary.) Gob even takes Michael to Cinco de Cuatro, to meet the rest of his family. George is too angry at them for being found out, and makes them leave.

So they go to the yacht and destroy party supplies, while Michael tries to convince him that the invented holiday is racist. Gob doesn't care. He has stocked the place with seasick patches and wants Michael to stay the night. He agrees, since he's so drunk, and they watch the fireworks from a distance. Finally they sleep off the tequila downstairs in separate cabins.

Gob sneaks over to look at Michael for a while, though. He's happy that Michael wants to still be friends even after Dad got mad and stopped paying for them to hang out. He then goes back to his room and tells Franklin, "He still kinda likes me." Pleased.

* * *

After Cinco, Mom is also mad at Gob for not telling her about Kitty for so long. Gob is not welcome on the yacht or at home lately, so he decides to leave town in his car.

"Mikey, let's go to Mexico for the weekend." So they drive three hours to the border, then share a hotel room. Gob's chicken dance gets them into trouble, and they hide out in the hotel, in separate beds.

That night while they're together, Gob is needy and crying again about his family, so Michael hugs and pats him comfortingly. Forgetting himself, Michael even kisses him. Surprised that he likes it, and Gob kisses him back, with tongue. It's so good.

Making out and getting undressed on the bed. Michael feels guilty about cheating on Tracey, but Gob is so irresistible. So magical.

Gob pulls off Michael's pants and blows him expertly. He's been sleeping with other guys lately to get by, while Michael insisted on being just friends, but now he doesn't have to settle for a substitute anymore.

"Oh God!" He lets Gob strip him naked, and he runs his fingers through Gob's hair. He never let a man do this before. Never thought it could feel like this.

After getting Michael off, Gob lies close and stares at him in the darkness, listening to his heartbeat. Wants to say that he loves Michael, wants to ask if Michael loves him too. But nobody ever loved him before, and he's afraid to break the fragile illusion. So he says nothing and gets undressed instead. Feels hard and excited from the way Michael looks in his eyes.

Michael kisses him and warns, "I've never--I don't know how to--"

Gob hushes him and says they can take it slow. Just wants to touch now, to kiss. Michael nods and they embrace, exploring how it feels to be naked together. Eventually Gob persuades Michael to give him a handjob. It's amazingly good, and Gob jokes about sirsumvrenting.

Gob cries out Michael's name when he comes, and they clean up the mess. Then Michael just holds him, so cozy and warm. He doesn't know how this happened. Him falling in love with a guy. Him cheating on Tracey. What was he going to do?

Worried by Michael's silence, Gob can't help asking, "Do you still like me, Mikey?"

Michael nods and finds himself saying, "I love you."

Gob's so happy and clings to him, singing a love song.

Michael kisses him and decides that all he wants is to love Gob like he needs. Like he deserves. He'll have to talk to Tracey then. Confess and break up when they get back from Mexico.

* * *

Maybe Tracey isn't surprised. She sensed what was happening all along, from the way Michael talked about him, and kept protesting that he wasn't being friends with Gob for the money.

Maybe they ask her to be their beard, because Gob's parents are homophobic and would disown him if he came out as bi and confessed that Michael was his boyfriend. They say it's just temporary until Michael finishes law school, then they'll come out and live together.

Gob's willing to sell his old cars to pay for Michael's schooling, as long as they can meet on the yacht at night. He hangs out with Franklin when Michael's busy. Maybe makes friends with Tracey too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry there's no George Michael in this. Unless I imagine that Michael still got Tracey pregnant. I still haven't figured out how to get Lindsay, Tobias, and Maeby to move back from Boston.


End file.
